A Charmed Life

It's funny how certain things sneak up on you. I have to admit that I've always had this mental image of what my future "home" would be like: a roomy front porch with pumpkins and black Hunter Wellies by the front door and kids coming home after school to the comforting smell of warm chocolate chip cookies. The yard is landscaped with hydrangea bushes and a mini willow. We have sprinklers and a roomy garage with an automatic door. Every room is painted the color of our choice (okay, my choice). It's big enough for comfort but small enough so that I can still hear the echoes of my children growing up all around me. It's home. Every once in a while I see a house that fits that "mold" in my head and I feel a tiny pinch of jealousy.

How silly I am to think that way. And I know it, but I still think it. This week as I've decorated for Fall and Halloween, I've thought a lot about the "homes" we've already created in our family. Our first apartment in Sugar House was a tiny one bedroom with low ceilings and pipes poking out of the walls in the bathroom. But I remember hanging our wedding pictures on the walls and making the most of our limited decor. I loved the kitchen. It was nothing fancy but it had a lovely dishwasher that made that satisfying hum in the evening before bedtime. Most--nope, ALL--of our furniture was second-hand and mismatched. We didn't own a couch, but we did have a large armchair that was big enough for the two of us. We planted our first garden, had our first miscarriage, earned our bachelor degrees and started a new business together in that home. Sure wasn't the crown of the cul-de-sac dream of mine, but it was perfect for us at that time.

Our second home was a real house. A really OLD house. It had been built in 1890 and was absolutely beautiful except for the fact that it needed about thirty thousand dollars of updating. We were working full time flipping houses, so moving into one that needed work seemed easy enough. And then reality hit us full force. I was five months pregnant and a little more "particular" than either one of us expected. I spend the first night in our new house crying in the shower for two hours. We slept on a mattress on the living room floor for the last four months of my pregnancy while we renovated our bedroom with our limited resources. I'll never forget lying on my back, 8 1/2 months pregnant, caulking baseboards. We had barely moved into our bedroom when I gave birth to our first daughter (not in the bedroom, at the hospital). We were officially a family in a house with chipping paint, a leaky swamp cooler, and a creepy cellar that smelled like pot. (Literally. The last family that lived there had a bi-polar son who actually camped out down there. We had to tear down his Bob Marley poster). A huge thunderstorm hit one day and I looked out our back window just as a ten foot section of our backyard fence fell over. There was no dishwasher, the washer and dryer were in the kitchen and our "breakfast nook" leaked when it rained. None of the windows opened, our only bathroom was covered in forest green tiles and every time I went to take a bath, I thought of all the bodies that had lied down in that old tub and changed my mind. Seriously, I was so ungrateful and unfortunately, unhappy. I can't say that I had a change of heart and learned to love that house while we lived there. It's only looking back now that I realize that despite my dislike for the circumstances, we still created a home in that house. And it was all the things it lacked that have deepened my gratitude for all that we have now.

When we moved into our current home, I made a promise to never say "I hate this house" again. And it's been an easy promise to keep, not because this is our "dream house" that fits the mold I've had in my head all these years, but because the lessons are slowly kicking in. I know there will come a day when we can afford the house of our dreams, but it might be too late by then to have the "home" of our dreams. I have been amazed at how happy and content I've been feeling for the past couple of weeks. It's really felt like home and not because I've finally painted my living room the right color or got the timer on the stove to stop going off at random, but because there's this perfect space in front of the fireplace where my oldest daughter was spinning this morning. Because my girls love to race around the loop that connects the living, dining, and kitchen area. Because this house is small enough that I don't need a monitor to hear all three of my children when they wake up in their rooms. Because I have a dishwasher. I've brought two new babies back from the hospital to this house and watched them grow within these imperfect walls.

I think it's okay to have a standard as far as living conditions go. But I finally understand how those who have so little in the world can be so happy. I finally understand what makes me happy. I'm so relieved to not be waiting anymore for that dream home.

With all that we lack, we somehow have it all.

Here's some pictures of how we've been getting ready for Fall and Halloween!



Pumpkin Whoooooopies! A favorite fall treat in our home.
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A fun idea to decorate the mantle, thanks to this picture on Pinterest. My husband hung every one of those pinecones for me. Not bad huh?


We cut out some bats to hang in our dining room, using this template.

You know the classic sucker ghosts craft? I love it. (Charlotte is making a ghost's "Oooooooo" sound in this pic).We used Dum-dums, tissues, and tiny rubber bands I use on my girls' hair. It was simple enough for them to do it on their own.

 
 Hazel is adding the eyes and mouth with a black marker. I found these clear 4x6 frames at Walmart for $1 each. We glued candy corns and pumpkins around the edges and the girls ate as many as they could along the way.

 I forgot to peel off the protective cover on the front of the frame and our candies have been slipping off, so we need to re-do this one. I'll have to add a final pic later, but you get the idea. You could also do this with black pom-pom spiders with pipe cleaner legs or small leaves you find outside--anything!
And the happiness part of it all...
  Finding Charlotte asleep with her wings on.
"So a guy walked into a bar..."

I seriously almost peed my pants when I saw Eloise crawling around with this piece of chalk in her mouth. Doesn't it look like she's holding a lighter too? It's a grape.

Behind her in this picture is, well, a mess, but part of that mess was a can of black shiny latex paint that I used to paint the "BOO" on my white pumpkins. I left it out because my girls have never really messed with that stuff and the lid was on. I ran an errand and left Eloise sleeping at home with her Dad. Then I got a call. She had spilled the paint on our wood floors and on my beautiful area rug that I'd coveted ever since we moved into this house.  I really wish I had a hidden camera in our living room so that I could have seen my husband's reaction to a catastrophe of this proportion. He knows how much I protect this rug from any and all possible danger. He said that she had spilled the paint without him noticing and then crawled over the rug, covered in paint, to where he was sitting on the couch. Then she patted his knee with a wet black hand and that's when he saw the shiny pool of paint spreading onto the edge of my rug.He says that he grabbed her said, "We're in so much trouble!!" He finally set her down in her high chair, stripped off her clothes and started cleaning up the mess. It was then that he saw the can of paint and remembered that it was MINE. He says that he had a moment of relief and said to himself, "It's HER fault!"  When I came home, he left to rent a professional carpet cleaner from Home Depot while I poured water over the stain to keep it from drying. Luckily for us, it all came out.  THENWhile my husband finished cleaning the rug, I ran off to my first prenatal visit with a new OB. Did I mention I'm pregnant? We are expecting our fourth in March and all thoughts of black paint and stained carpets vanished as we learned that we are FINALLY expecting a boy!! Happiness.Pure happiness.

Bringing back the "I spy"oscope

The "I Spy"oscope is one of my very favorite activities. My first post on how to make these can be found here.

When it was my turn to teach Joy School, I rounded up my empty toilet paper rolls and made a few more by cutting and rolling a piece of card stock and securing it with tape. The kids decorated their scopes with markers, stickers, construction paper, and crayons. When they were done, we used a hold punch to create two holes at the top and tied yarn through to create a necklace.

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 We went into the backyard and "spied" some great things! This is a great activity to do now that the season is changing and leaves are changing... Don't you just LOVE the fall?

Toddler Activities for the Letter Y

For the letter "Y," we started out with a "Y" scavenger hunt. I hid large cut-outs of the letter "Y" around the house with instructions on the back that involved something to do with the sound of the letter. The girls loved racing to find these "Y's" which were all in different colors. I made a big deal of finding the golden YELLOW "Y." We enjoyed answering the questions on the back of the letters such as:
1. Can you show me how to say "yes" without talking?
2. Can you make a big yawn?
3. Can you act like a yak? (We did watch a youtube clip on yaks in the beginning of our Activity Time)

Then I asked the girls to choose their favorite color "Y" and glue pieces of yarn on the back in any pattern of their choice. For my two year old, this activity was right on. She got to use her scissors and cut the yarn into smaller sizes, she dug into the glue stick with her fingernails and mushed it into the paper and VOILA!

(Does anyone else give up on dressing their potty-training child?)


  My four year old, however, had something a little more challenging in mind. She decided to build on our newly gained knowledge of the YAK and turn those "Y's" into antlers! I drew the face of a yak (I can honestly say that I've never done that before) and she ran with it. The antlers were attached, glitter was spread across the face--making it a female yak, or "cow"--and then I think she felt that the glitter needed to be held in place by LOTS of tape...


And there you go! Some diverse ideas of what to do with the letter Y!

Toddler Activities for the Letter X

For the letter X, we talked about our BONES and X-Rays. For my two year old, I cut out two bones and had her glue them in the shape of the letter X. For my four year old, I drew a (rough) picture of a skeleton and cut it into pieces for a puzzle:

Materials:

black and white construction paper

scissors

stick glue

Step One: It's been a few weeks since I did this activity with my girls, but I remember that my two year old was on a rampage that morning, so I knew her craft had to be QUICK AND EASY. I cut the bones out of white construction paper and had them ready on black paper for her to glue into place.

She lasted long enough to glue her bones in place to make an "X," but was done before I could catch a picture of her with it.

Step Two: Hazel loved her puzzle. I pulled up a few pictures of a skeleton on google images and drew a skeleton onto white construction paper (if I can do it, so can you). Then I cut the skeleton into sections to create a puzzle for her.

She glued the pieces into place until her skeleton was finished. She was so proud of it that she taped it onto her bedroom door.

These are great activities to get ready for Halloween as well. I can't wait to start Halloween crafts!

Toddler Activities for Two Year Olds

I have to share that our routine has changed a bit this fall. My oldest daughter is doing Joy School, which I am really loving. I like that the curriculum focuses on teaching your children principles (decision-making, obedience, gratitude, respect, etc.) that will help them enjoy learning and get the most out of their education. We have a great group of kids and so far, it's going well.

That gives me two full mornings each week where I can have one-on-one time with Charlotte, my two year old while my baby naps. I've been tailoring our "activity time" to her two-year-old-ness and this is what we ended up with on our first day:

We sang a couple of songs and did some finger plays, talked about the weather, then started drawing on our white board. I 'd found an idea in this book I've been wanting to try, so we moved upstairs to the girls' bedroom mirror. I gave her a dry erase marker and asked her to draw different parts of her body onto the mirror...

If you look closely, you can see tiny little dots that are her eyes, a small curve of a mouth, and very scribbly hair! (I love her face in this picture)

Do you see the lovely rat's nest she has on the back of her head? It's permanent.

Then we noticed the play horses in the corner (compliments of my amazingly talented friend, Juliann) and decided to go horse back riding! We looked up some fun videos on YouTube about horses and then took those babies onto the driveway.

And that lasted about five seconds before she saw her bike and decided she wanted to end activity time with a walk! I have a feeling that our adventures together are going to involve a lot of SERENDIPITY!

I really look forward to focusing on activities for this very CURIOUS age of two.
Stay tuned for much much more...

Toddler Activities for the letter W

Here's another activity to celebrate the letter "W." It involves one of my favorite books, Waiting for Wings by Lois Ehlert. We decided to make some butterfly "wings" of our own.

Materials:

construction paper

markers

scissors

popsicle sticks

tape

glitter (optional)

hole punch (optional)

 

 Step One: Fold a piece of construction paper in half width-wise and draw half of your butterfly on the fold.

   
Step Two: If your toddler/preschooler can cut it out on their own, help them to remember to leave the fold untouched so they can open up their butterfly when they're done.


Step Three: We used one of the pages in this book as our template for colors and design. I helped my two year old with the black lines to get the ball rolling. She took over from there.




Step Four: Tape your popsicle stick onto the back of your butterfly and fly it around! We decided to make a second butterfly for Hazel who was in Joy School. We used the hold punch to add some flare.



Of course once Hazel came home, she decided to make many more butterflies during quiet time. I ended up with an entire bouquet of butterfly wings!

Toddler Activities for the Letter W

A fun way to learn about the letter W is to play a game we call, "Where is Wally?" 

I drew and cut out a whale from blue construction paper and wrote an upper and lower case "W" on his belly. I hid him in different parts of the house and the girls had to hunt him down, singing a song that I literally made up in the moment. It went something like this (to the tune of "Where is Thumbkin?"): 

"Where is Wally? 

Where is Wally?

Where is he?

Where is he?

Wally won't you come out, 

Wally won't you come out

and play with me,

play with me."

(Not a music major here)

Image via FunDraw.com

The first child to find Wally gets to hide him for everyone else! By the end of the game I was wishing I'd laminated him because he was slightly crumbled. My girls loved this game and they continued to play it after I quietly retired.

The Happiness Jar

And I'm back! We drove TWELVE hours to Colorado to spent an amazing Labor Day weekend with family. It really was so relaxing. On the trip, I started reading Teaching Your Children Joy which was a good reminder of how important and special these toddler/preschooler years are. I really feel like the best thing I can give my kids right now is my T-I-M-E. They say that kids are most impressionable in their first five years, soaking in everything around them, and I'm grateful for this short period of time where I get to be their teacher and example full-time at home. At the same time, that can be intimidating and terrifying! The more parenting books I read, the more I realize that I ultimately have control over one thing: my own behavior. With every chapter I read on teaching my kids self-discipline, honesty, happiness , and self-reliance, the more I realize that I need to live those principles myself so that I can teach them to my kids with more than just words.

One thing we started recently was a "Happiness Jar." We've recently struggled with YELLING in our family so I dug around my storage room until I found a nice, small jar that could potentially be filled one day with hard-earned marbles. If you do something kind for someone else or hold your tongue when tempted to explode, you get a marble. If you behave badly or yell, a marble comes out. Once the jar is filled, we get to do something really exciting as a family (I think the zoo is #1 on our list).

(We couldn't find marbles so we're using fish bowl stones)

There's our little jar on our mantle. My wreath is red, not black, I promise. 

So far, it's worked like a charm for all of us. It's been fun including the girls in my own goals to have better self-control. In January, I set up a little "rewards" system for myself if I could make it a certain amount of weeks without yelling in front of my kiddos (time-out is for everyone!). It took me five months to get my first reward! Then I noticed that my system wasn't working as well as I'd hoped (I guess we couldn't afford a nice enough reward).  So I asked my four year old to help me out.

Our code phrase is "Where's the fire?" We decided that it's only okay to YELL when there's a fire, a birthday (woo hoo!) or when you're playing outside. So this phrase is a gentle reminder to lower your voice and maybe take a time-out if needed until you feel better. We also started helping one another keep our cool when feeling frustrated by simply saying, "Choose to be happy." (I really hated that phrase when I suffered a bout of postpartum after my second baby. But now I can take it).

I'm amazed at the power those fishbowl stones have over our girls' behavior. They do NOT like to lose one out of the jar. We make sure to praise them a lot when they earn one and make a big deal about it. Also, when I break one of the rules, I make sure to apologize, even if they deserved it, so they can see that everyone makes mistakes, but amends must be made. Here's one of the best quotes I've ever read about parenting:

"It is unlikely that you will ever be a perfect parent, nor will your children ever be perfect children. 'Losing it' is an ongoing process, which is just one reason to learn the valuable skill of taking some positive time-out as soon as you can catch yourself 'losing it'--sometimes sooner, and sometimes later. We will all continue to make mistakes throughout our lifetimes, even when we know better." Jane Nelson, Ed.D, Author of Positive Discipline Series





 What works in your home?